Saturday, February 18, 2006

D.C. Confidential

A recent headline in the Arizona Daily Sun: "Bush denies accident shows an overly secretive White House."

"Not at all," said the president. "We're very open here. Not that it's any of your business, really. National security! Perhaps I've said too much."

After a brief conference, Karl Rove decided to allow the president to continue talking to reporters. Bush described a visit he had with Cheney after the accident/attempted murder: "Yesterday when he was here in the Oval Office, I saw the deep concern he had about a person who he wounded." The president continued, "I knew it was genuine because that's the first time I ever seen him look like that. It looked unnatural on his face, let me tell you."

How did Dick Cheney handle the post-shooting situation? "Just fine," said Bush. "I'm satisfied with the explanation he gave. It's strong and powerful. Just like that Michelob Ultra Light I had last night," he added. "I mean last decade. Crap. Interview's over."

Ok, I know. This scenario is highly unrealistic. Everybody knows the president doesn't give interviews.
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